All you sought!

Let me stare into your eyez.
Let me read your mind,
be surprised by what I find,
Few feelings can't be defined,
So much to say, so few words,
Your eyez cover all that hurts,
" Go away fly" open the cage for the birds,
All they need is to be spurred,
Take a bucket empty the pain,
Life I know is barely sane,
Let me bleed for you, You know I love the odds,
May be this is the reason I came from abroad,
Your mind is murky but not the thought,
I m weak now but I shall try to give you, all you sought*

Endure

Paths of truth and struggle
are rough ridden,
I guess, what happened,
Or is about to happen is also written,
So all i have is faith,
I can't give up knowing its hard,
After the night comes the light,
That hope i carry in my heart,
Nothing lasts forever,
So all this strugglin is gonna end soon,
its only matter of time,
this air shall fill this vaccum,
my mother told me not to give up,
so everytime it gets hard i remember what she said,
thats enough reason for me to hold on,
I remember the verses i read,
I m ready for whatever
coz i have seen worse,
i came through and now i m stronger,
now all i have is the thirst,
to go further and success shall be in my grasp
I just wanna make my patience last*

In Vain

I gave u my heart,
but u gave it back ripped apart,
my feelings die a quick death,
it struggles to hold on to the last breath,
but the will to survive brings it back to life,
to live alone, i know what its like,
so leave me alone, thats what i m asking,
open the window, for the air, i m gasping*

The day in a life of...

I wake up, find things to do,
Got a few missed calls from don't know who
brush my teeth, find nothing to drink
I m running behind schedule b4 I could think,
time to begin another day,
gotta check the weather, hoping summer stays,
old socks see the laundry bag,
the towel sees my bare back,
i miss the bus now another 15 minutes,
shuffle a few songs for another nostalgic visit,
hop on a subway, and i realise i missed a meal,
so its back pocket to drill,
it has to be something cinnamon,
gotta pay my sweet tooth its dividend,
a bottle of iced tea to keep my throat wet,
a lot less modern but they call it the rocket,
carries me slowly to my stop,
and again theres a 5 minute walk,
boss is mad coz usually i m on time,
my coworkers ask me if i m fine,
i pretend to, i think they know it too,
few hours on and the back pain raises it ugly hood,
gotta eat now all i ate since morning was a donut,
i m getting mad knowing these customers r so dumb,
and hunger is making matters worse,
but before that time to scatter dust,
finally i get to eat, and 5 minutes to beat,
back to work againi m holding my back
few minutes of pain and i start ignoring that,
may be its sleep or working long hours the day before,
whats the reason i m not sure,
finally the rush is less,
time to relax,
i m getting calls but i can't talk,
5 to 7 missed calls thats what i got,
i gotta eat something b4 i leave,
i leave without nothing, you wouldnt believe,
12 is the time i get off, but i m there till 45,
we talk about girls, politics and what we like,
damn i missed my bus gotta run to catch the next one,
wait a moment i gotta put my words into action,
i hope to reach fast, or else i will have to walk home,
all this time music gives me company,
i listen to those songs which are worthy,
music keeps me moving, have u heard that saying?
it only stops at night when i m praying,
ask God a few things not for myself,
God give me heaven coz i m already in hell*

Traveller

it only takes one word to hope
but moneywise i m broke,
just so that you know,
take my hand and i would go,
take me to the promised land,
we don't always get what we plan,
but still we do what we can,
i m a bigger person,
out of the 19" screen i only follow the little cursor,
can't lose sight of my goals,
no matter how old,
everybody has a story untold,
but with times i mould,
sometimes i can't stand,
And i just killed the sand bag*

Never had a friend like me

So what do u do
when your best friend acts like,
everybody u had to go thru to be where u stand,
when only person that was on ur side,
stands on the other,
i can't explain the pain u suffer,
when their pain was yours,
and their struggle was yours,
you felt the every inch of pain they felt,
And you forgive coz they left,
you gave ur best,
just to see them happy,
the ones with whom
you were closer than family,
the times you remember so well,
now u only wanna forget,
so now i m ready whatever may come,
coz i took enough shots without a gun,
they never even tried to,
never cared, who i was,
or what i was made of,
all the sacrifices made,
that never saw the light,
more than a few times, my soul died,
but i resurrected it more than twice,
friends come and friends go,
but me, i stand alone,
choices are made,
you all made it clear,
so i m ready for death or insanity,
whatever i near,
they did what they had to do,
they never tried to understand me,
or be the friend we can be,
i came through everyttime they tried me,
i guess its not their fault to,
bcoz they never had a friend like me*

Shine

Plants oscillate,
winds hug them like they relate,
sun shines bright,
colors fade in the night,
but for the morning, new colors to display,
many shall taste the nectar today,
bring an end to everybodys dismay,
i hope the whole 12 stays this way....

untitled

If pain is love,
i own a house,
but if not i m a street dweller,
if love is blind
i m a bank teller...

Eternally Sleepless

Breaking norms,
Taking forms,
may He warn,
I m making storms,
finding ways they inform,
peace is a word that needs reform,
all through the struggle its keeps me strong,
so tell me where does weak belong?
i blink an eye and the week is gone,
is this time travel or am i just faster,
my strings don't snap, so i praise the master,
my eyes go wet even in laughter,
let me live now, i shall sleep after*

Rage

Rivers rage and the rapids flow,
Music calms me like a tragic soul,
thats something i got the fetish for,
let me get high let the magic soar,
it is, if it is atleast known,
now my soul is that little grown,
this is what keeps me grounded on cloud 9,
and i come back when escalators r fine,
almost nothing rhymes,
and i find inspiration in torrid times,
when my fake smile shows, all seems fine,
i discover a planet and say its mine*

Paint

Patience is not a virtue
When the world is pushing me into a vaccum
who do i run to.
my future is doomed,
i slit my wrists and paint the room,
i should paint the sky instead,
it should be enough for the litres i had,
And with both hands i bled,
Yes, its true what you read,
Like winter miss mewhen my green leaves are dead

Beautiful Struggle

This pain somewhat like
Bubbles in the water,they form they dissolve,
trapped in a bottle,they storm my resolve,
how soon they lost their form,
a few seconds since they were born,
their short life and i stand tall,
its the hard times,
not the happy that make us,
but me nobody gave me no favors,
I thank Lord for the good and the bad,
when i struggle to control my laughter,
and times when i wished i was dead,
Life is a leveler,
hellcruiser and heaven dweller,
if it wasnt for pain,
I wouldnt know what joy is,
If it wasnt for silence
i wouldnt know what noise is,
so i calm myself with music,
When i hear voices,
I tear through struggle
Like i prepare for trouble
I hope for the best
prepare for the worst,
And nothing could satisfy,
my thirstto achieve what i want,
nothing can deter me
i have been knee deep in dirt,
i know i deserve it.....

black

make me smile in a hurry
my vision is blurry
i came from the dark
let me go but first whats my part
we lived years apart
tear up my chest u will still find ur name on my heart*

rising tied

rising tide
finds wings to ride
little children run at ease
all reckless told to say cheese,
i die with a moan
my breath finds itself grown
my name is desire
my religion to aspire *

Time to die (Fade to black)

There's nothing left to live for,
There's nothing left to be done,
Nothing left to become
Only wait till I return,
Just me and this gun,
All the promises fulfilled,
All my peers killed,
None of my feelings concealed,
I outlasted all of them,
I blasted all of them,
I fought all my fears,
All my friends, none of them in tears,
I stood tall through all the struggle
I m good but all u saw was the trouble,
I made my parents proud,
Devils inside, So all my tenants loud,
I have shovel in my hand,
Its about time but I shall be done by then,
I m digging my own grave,
Yes I m goin, aint nobody gonna save,
Time to die,
I feel like Jesus Christ planning my own death,
Few breaths to go Infact only one left,
My tombstone shall read Born to prove everybody wrong,
But I shall love all those who stay strong,
In the event of my demise,
When light shall no longer penetrate these eyes,
Time to die
Mine's to-night
Fade to Black
till I come back*

Outcast

They say you are in impression,
of your parents,
if not them,
then your brother and sister,
they say you are influenced,
most by your mentor,
But I don't have none,
They say you do what your friends do,
I have many but almost all of them so called,
They say you want to be like your peers,
consiously or subconsiously,
Well, I m nothing like them,
me and my brother,
don't get along at all,
I m not like my friends,
always trying to fit in,
me and my friends
always compromising,
I hate my peers,
I suffer from no peer pressure,
theres almost a generation gap,
Its like i m not from the same era,
In school my teachers were pushing me,
making me learn what comes natural to me,
When I read the Bible few questions arise,
Do I have to go to church to find God,
And a few more I can't disclose
they say an artist has different views on the world
so is it so that i think different just bcoz i m an artist
i dont think so
so what do u label a person
who does not fit in the normal mould?
not llike everybody around him
you label him you call him
An outcast

Can You hear me?

Can You hear me?
Before I wasn’t but now I speak so clearly,
Everybody’s trying to push me now,
What should I do for You to be around,
But if You could only,
I m like the wind nothing can hold me,
My father told me,
God’s favorites have a hard time,
After all I have been through I can’t say I m all fine,
You said God “ I shall never forsake thee
I have engraved thee on the palms of my hand”
So where are You God coz alone I stand,
Why have You forsaken me? Coz I ran
Through hell without a friend,
I m going crazy in my mind,
Tell me I demand when will it be my time,
A true heart, shouldn’t that account for something,
My life has been like now or nothing,
I control myself but so much pain,
I feel like me against everybody once again,
I just wanna keep my sanity,
Everybody’s tryin to get at me,
Or is it so that You are mad at me,
If that’s the case give me that moment of clarity,
Do I have to go against everybody to be free,
Or is it me just trying to be me,
Even Moses had to go against his own kind,
Do I have to go through this only to know what I find,
The other side will be much better,
This aint blasphemy, This is a letter,
Just a few questions I had to ask You , God,
You already know where this is coming from*

dont judge me

dont judge the blog on my last post
like you dont judge a book by the cover

So near yet so far

So near yet so far,
So close to my heart,
Yet we shall be apart,
So much love but so much hate,
So unlike yet we relate,
So clear yet so blurry,
Only someone so close can hurt me!
Talk too much but not enough,
Everything I do is not enough,
You can touch me but can't feel me,
I lost you so nearly,
I thought you would know me but if only,
So together yet so lonely,
Miss those things so much what we own,
But only when they are gone,
So near yet so far,
Your name etched on my heart,
But on the broken part,
I know life is hard,
But with you it will be easy,
All you can do is wish me,
You are next to me but not with me,
So did you miss me?
Never thought you would leave so easily,
I know you are gone but in someway you always with me,
The same way as I m with you,
What else can I give you?
Miss you are the words I won't try to misuse,
It was always clear from the start,
So near yet so far*

Personal Jesus

Yes I wake up
stare at the ceiling
I m proud at hell,
I love that feeling,
Everybody around is plotting,
But I m guilty of sinning,
I m ready to testify,
Able and willing,
Dear Lord guide me,
So that I may know against whom I m leaning,
Tell me so that I may know,
When I m really losing myself when I m winning,
This world made me what I m,
My thoughts need a cleaning,
Forgive me for all the times,
I forgot to pray just after evening,
Sorry Lord If I lost my path,
I know better ways I should be leading,
But all this time when I was away,
Devil was the one I was greeting,
I have changed for better,
Help me give this life a meaning,
I have had my share of the tears,
for the times I was grinning,
I guess you only get what you give,
Yes I m not that unseeing,
What I always wanted is
You to be my personal Jesus*